It’s Thursday, which means we’re only about a bottle and a half away from the weekend. Unless you’re a parent or have a full-time job (paid or unpaid) then it’s more like three bottles. Physics, right? In any case, there’s the cheap wine coming in a 2 liter box, there is the 4.99 bottle with the same content but a sticker that says something in French and also the 199.99 bottles, but for some unknown reason, the label isn’t in Klingon and that’s why we don’t understand the concept of those. Anyways, whether you call it «Christmas juice», «currant juice» or «medicine», there is the right wine for each of us. As proven by the following Tweets. Cheers!
#1: If you’re wondering why people enjoy their family …
My little sister drank my parents wine and added water to the empty bottles 😂😂
I’m catching smoke that time I’m all the way in Durban. I’m dying 😭😂 pic.twitter.com/5UMl23WW3j
— Lerato💜 (@I_Kimberraxie) August 21, 2021
#2: Also great for cat owners
Non-parents gift guide for toddlers: Buy boxed wine. When the parents are done with the wine, the kid can play with the box. Win-win.
— Faux Ma (@Faux_Ma) September 4, 2016
A cleanse for me is switching to white wine.
— Gennefer Gross IS VACCINATED!!! (@Gennefer) December 28, 2015
#4: The quiet heroes amongst us
Was really delighted that a dad on the school ZOOM call drank two shakers of martinis and a bottle of wine then trying to sit down, missed his chair, disappearing behind his desk and was never seen again
Really made the time fly
— Diedrich Bader (@bader_diedrich) August 6, 2020
#5: Sounds reasonable
Someone asked how much I usually spend on a bottle of wine. I don’t know; half an hour?
— RUTH BUZZI (@Ruth_A_Buzzi) March 5, 2021
#6: Haven’t we all been there?
My 6yo carried our Google Home Mini around the house all day asking it question after question to the point where I found it locked in the bathroom crying with a glass of wine.
— SpacedMom (@copymama) July 8, 2019
#7: Don’t underestimate the practice this takes
If I did one of those wine and paint nights the instructor would be like wow look at you, you are really good at wine.
— denise (@Stellacopter) February 18, 2016
#8: No judgement please
Me: I’ll just have one glass of wine
The glass: pic.twitter.com/jTMpHUggIf
— WASERIC (@ericdgriffey) January 17, 2020
#9: Excellent choice
One of my 4 nephews just brought me wine and said, «Here’s your Christmas juice,» and now he’s the one I’m leaving everything to.
— Kendra Alvey 👻 (@Kendragarden) December 25, 2015
#10: It definitely is!
Today is national drink wine day. Or, as I call it, Thursday.
— blip (@FrozenSighs) February 18, 2016
#11: The unpopular side effects of wine consumption
One year ago I had a third glass of wine at a party and now I’m cleaning poop off the wall behind the baby’s changing table in what used to be my office.
— Bess Kalb (@bessbell) December 7, 2019
#12: Pomegranate juice! *wink*
co-worker asked if my big glass of red liquid was wine. at 11am. it’s pomegranate juice but i’m glad they know xactly what kind of girl i am
— Alexis Wilkinson (@OhGodItsAlexis) September 9, 2015
#13: This order will definitely impress
me: onion rings and a bottle of wine for the table
waiter: white or red?
me, trying to impress my date: whichever onion the chef prefers
— suki (@desukidesu) April 12, 2021
Don’t blame it on the onions and start sharpening your flirting skills instead: