Have fun with the best and funniest Tweets of the week.
#1:
Think I made a new friend today pic.twitter.com/a4wX2xW1Dv
— Sir Michael (@Michael1979) August 29, 2018
#2:
WHAT
THE
FUCK pic.twitter.com/xvQpnsCDmH— Somov (@iam_somov) October 4, 2018
#3:
[Boiling in a pot]
Boy lobster: AAAAGGGGHHH!!
Girl lobster: I'm cold
— marf (@MarfSalvador) April 13, 2017
#4:
Kid: There’s a monster living in my closet
Monster: do you have any idea how expensive a studio apartment is in this neighborhood
— schmox (@IvoryGazelle) October 4, 2018
#5:
Meanwhile, in Iceland. pic.twitter.com/oiDpYUOGy7
— RustyBertrand (@RustyBertrand) October 7, 2018
#6:
gonna be an idiot piece of shit for halloween this year oh wow look already dressed
— chuuch (@ch000ch) October 2, 2018
#7:
THERE IS A GECKO SITTING ON THE TOUCHSCREEN OF THE PHONE, MAKING CALLS WITH HIS TINY GECKO FEET!!! This gecko has called me 15 times, and everyone in our recent call list. *Actual photo of telemarketer* @TMMC @GEICO @HawaiianTel pic.twitter.com/USyKeOiDbE
— Dr. Claire Simeone (@Claire_Simeone) October 5, 2018
#8:
[working at starbucks]
guy from high school who was mean to me but doesn't recognize me: can i get a vanilla latte
[later]
me: *fully aware his name is cory* vanilla latte for Corny
him: *busy on phone* thanks
[later at home]
Me: *still full of adrenaline*
— ally 𝖌𝖆𝖙𝖔𝖗 🐊🏳️🌈 ᵐᵒˢᵗˡʸ ᵈᵒᵍ ᵖᶦᶜˢ (@notacroc) October 5, 2018
#9:
My hero of the Bundesliga weekend – this Fortuna Düsseldorf fan. Carrying at least seven beers *and* a bratwurst. #ImpossibleIsNothing pic.twitter.com/xjCG2nHKxa
— Archie Rhind-Tutt (@archiert1) October 7, 2018
#10:
This is a terrible time to be named Brett Kavanagh
— Brett Kavanagh (@Brett_Kavanagh) October 6, 2018
#11:
🎵 Scooby Doo PA PA ✨🔊 pic.twitter.com/11f7scA1VX
— Mayapolarbear (@mayapolarbear) October 6, 2018
#12:
Watched predator again today. Then recorded the end credits with the full house theme
You’re welcome. pic.twitter.com/FXIypDZbVZ
— Brandon Ream (@Reamkore) October 5, 2018
#13:
me: ah, now I will drift gently off to dreamland.
refrigerator: I SHALL MAKE US SOME ICE CUBES
— spacegirl incognito (@iamspacegirl) October 5, 2018
#14:
Me: $27 for two movie tickets?
Ticket guy: Uh, we have some pretty cheap matinees
Me: Buddy, I don't care how slutty your sea cows are
— Adam Cerious (@Browtweaten) September 30, 2018
#15:
Me: My eyes are up here
Picasso: I disagree
— Abbie (@AbbieEvansXO) September 26, 2018
#16:
[wedding]
Priest: repeat after me
Groom: after me
P: … [to bride] is he serious
Bride: no his name is gary— FRO VO (@fro_vo) November 5, 2015