The best Tweets of the last week! Served on a silver platter straight to you! Have fun!
Normalize letting people keep their camera off during zoom calls so that they can maintain one personal boundary while work invades our home lives.
— Marissa D. Barrera (@mdb2) March 3, 2021
fuck drugs have u ever moo'ed at a cow and had it moo back at u
— james (@video_jame) February 27, 2021
Can we all agree that cooking & cleaning is a basic life skill and not a gender role????
— Keva (@Ayodelefx) March 1, 2021
Did the person who invented the phrase “one-hit wonder” invent any other popular phrases?
— Ben (@benzawilski) March 1, 2021
If you ever hear a parent say, “oh, good! it comes with glitter!” know that it is not, in fact, good.
— mom mom mom mom mom (@notmythirdrodeo) February 28, 2021
I like that the venus fly trap could just get energy from the sun but chooses violence.
— Subhah (@Subhah) February 23, 2021
“gender is what’s between your legs” ok my pronouns are gorilla/grip
— todoroki (@justannalese) February 27, 2021
a 21yo just asked me if I’ve heard of an old school band called Green Day
— Jenna B. Badd (@jennapurrlee) March 1, 2021
has anyone else not been to the dentist since Covid and also not for the five years before that
— Ely Kreimendahl (@ElyKreimendahl) March 3, 2021
has gen z discovered that adult millennials used to form quidditch leagues yet
— Paul McCallion (@OrangePaulp) March 2, 2021
people who take pride in not being nice are very weird to me
— asia (@asiasilvis) February 27, 2021
date: I think we’ve actually met before
picasso: sorry I’m not good with faces
— jo (@whatsJo) February 27, 2021
If you put "based on a true story" at the top of your resume you can basically write whatever you want.
— Conan O'Brien (@ConanOBrien) February 25, 2021
There's so much I admire about the French: their sophistication, their cinema, their willingness to prosecute former presidents.
— Stephen Colbert (@StephenAtHome) March 2, 2021
This is a high school band practice in Wenatchee,WA pic.twitter.com/q2prCJemX0
— Ari Hoffman (@thehoffather) February 24, 2021
i need to start selling poor quality products and marketing them like this. https://t.co/0XPG6FoNbR
— le courvoisier (@chinicheeks) March 1, 2021
Life is just choosing your subway sandwich when you're 9 and ordering the same one until you die
— lisa pizza (@sixteenburritos) February 25, 2021
gonna tell my kids this was daft punk pic.twitter.com/U0YhtLZ6kR
— ɢʀᴇɢɢʏ (@itmegreggy) March 3, 2021
Friend: You've been acting different since you found $20 in your coat pocket
Me, googling "truffle water":
— Ron Iver (@ronnui_) February 28, 2021
"i acknowledge that i have read and agree to the above terms and conditions" pic.twitter.com/Ny0PLvQlZ3
— Waxou (@maxoupial) March 1, 2021