Do you remember the times when we saw the Oscars show and we all thought: Oh, cool, only five years until I can watch this movie on TV for free? This was back in the day when Leonardo DiCaprio didn’t walk the red carpet with a fetus (the older ones may remember). Today, our feelings are more like: This is the movie of the year, are you kidding me, I saw it in 1998 on Netflix! Right? But hey, if you want the best of today, don’t wait for the Oscars, all you have to do is check out our daily. Please enjoy!
#1:
don’t talk shit about ur coworkers. u never know who it could get back to. instead dont talk to anyone at work. retreat into the lonesome cocoon of ur own anxieties emerging only to feed
— tatum (@50FirstTates) April 27, 2021
#2:
A lot of women in 2021 don’t do the things “our grandmothers used to do for our grandfathers”
🗣 BECAUSE OUR GRANDMOTHERS PULLED US TO THE SIDE AND TOLD US NOT TO
— dara tafakari (@TrulyTafakari) April 26, 2021
#3:
You think you’re having a bad day? My 7 year old just figured out how to whistle.
— ThisOneSays (@ThisOneSayz) April 26, 2021
#4:
*walking my wife down the aisle toward her father during the divorce proceedings*
— ︎[email protected] (@TweetPotato314) April 26, 2021
#5:
Every family has an old beach towel with a cartoon character on it and nobody knows where it came from
— jon drake (@DrakeGatsby) April 27, 2021
#6:
A few years ago, a friend of mine was approached by someone asking him to sign a sheet for a petition to put an anti-trans bathroom bill on the WA ballot. He said «Sure, let me see that.»
Then he took the clipboard with its 500 signatures and threw it into the Puget Sound.
— Joseph Brassey (@JosephBrassey) April 27, 2021
#7:
— Out of Context Pokemon (@OoCPokemon) April 24, 2021
#8:
If we take a knee, they’re mad. If we speak up like I do, they’re mad. If we protest like Martin Luther King Jr. taught us to do, they’re mad. What is it that they expect us to do when police keep killing us?
— Maxine Waters (@RepMaxineWaters) April 25, 2021
#9:
having two cats instead of one is more expensive and double the pain in the ass but occasionally they’ll be sitting kind of near each other in a room i walk into and i’ll get to say «oh, hey guys» and in that moment it’s worth it
— matt (@Lubchansky) April 26, 2021
#10:
why not ask her about the oscar she won 15 minutes ago https://t.co/LQ6tFdpzfW
— clemmie (@cIemmie) April 26, 2021
