Hello, hello, hello. It’s Wednesday, so only tomorrow and a very short Friday left, until we can begin our weekend adventures. It’s gonna be wild, we’ll hunt down an entire pizza, befriend a local couch in our very own living room and sharpen our outdoor skills by opening a whole bottle of an alcoholic beverage of our choice without the help of anything but a self bought screwdriver. Imagine the next 48 hours like the time you’re at the salad bar of an otherwise perfect buffet, but you can already smell the meat section. And you saved your appetizer plate for something we call «side meat». Another kind of appetizers are of course our gems, freshly prepared for you by your favorite cooks. Enjoy!
#1: Every personality disorder has to start somewhere
i'm unmarried and childless but sometimes i make up a fictional family for my twitter jokes. my wife hates it but my kids think it's hilarious
— Ian Dukes (@ianpauldukes) August 24, 2021
#2: We need more inventions like this
Garlic bread? You mean a pasta sauce shovel.
— Default 🇦🇺 (@McClaneJohn2) August 24, 2021
#3: We love this parallel universe
— slate (@PleaseBeGneiss) August 25, 2021
#4: Can demons have regrets?
if a demon possessed me i would be like ok take it from here good luck
— jame (@videojame_) August 23, 2021
#5: That’s the spirit
when i hear people talking about working 80 hour weeks and grinding nonstop its so inspirational. really inspires me to never get a shit job like that
— not three raccoons in a trenchcoat (@50FirstTates) August 23, 2021
#6: God has taste
Harsh but fair pic.twitter.com/FdseWuDjft
— Julicorn 🦄 (@ChicksRule) August 24, 2021
#7: My dog my rules
“Can I pet your dog”
“Are you vaccinated?”
“That’s kind of a personal question”
“Yeah, well, this is my personal dog”— Andrew Harris (@harrissound) August 20, 2021
#8: Kids are unreasonable
you throw up literally one time and all the sudden your boys make you choose a safe word for tickle fight
— carter hambley (@carterhambley) August 22, 2021
#9: It’s time for a new flood
Just saw a recipe for cauliflower gravy on Instagram. No wonder god has abandoned us
— Shenanigans (@Shenanigans_luv) August 21, 2021
#10: Those were easier times
limewire: hotel california by the beastly boys
11 year old me [about to download yet another virus onto the family computer]: yep sounds good
— soul nate (@MNateShyamalan) August 25, 2021
And if you’re still feeling stressed