Hey, has Donald Trump pardoned you yet? No? Well, then congratulations, chances are you neither committed a federal crime nor are not closely related to him. It’s a tough call, but if you ever have to choose, we would suggest you go for option #2! Speaking of good choices, once again we went on a hunting trip and came back with the best Tweets of the day! Please enjoy.
#1:
dudes will be like “nobody cares about your spotify wrapped” and then post a map of their running route
— Lumberzack (@ItsLumberzack) December 4, 2020
#2:
So excited to start my new advent calendar <3 pic.twitter.com/ll63YP9ILj
— G. L. DiVittorio (@ginadivittorio) December 2, 2020
#3:
My 36 year old boyfriend just asked if I ever “go up the stairs on all fours” and then demonstrated and admitted “I do it all the time”
— Megsy (@maehaun) December 3, 2020
#4:
what americans what it
think dystopia actually
looks like looks like pic.twitter.com/zBwMH8CR6s— Garrett! as the Eternal Vibes Guy (@vibesrestored) December 3, 2020
#5:
how my girl vs. guy friends reacted back when i came out as trans: pic.twitter.com/9nRjEAJaYf
— kristofer thomas (@itskristofer) December 3, 2020
#6:
you’re opening a chip bag and it goes great except for a tiny tear and it seems fine but then the rip starts to get bigger and you’re worried you won’t be able to seal the bag and it keeps going and the entire bag is split open and it continues until the earth fully bifurcates
— Ron Iver (@ronnui_) December 3, 2020
#7:
“the rat is not ratatouille, the rat’s name is remy” is the 2000s version of “his name is not frankenstein, he’s frankenstein’s monster”
— sherry🥺 (@sherrysworld) December 2, 2020
#8:
inventor of worcestershire sauce: but what to call it
guy that named wednesday: u ready to fuck some ppl up bro
— Taming Fred Savage (@FredTaming) December 3, 2020
#9:
YouTube just recommended a video to me called «How to not take things personally» and I’ve never been so offended
— Sarah Cooper (@sarahcpr) December 2, 2020
#10:
This is the guy that needs to be vaccinating everyone #VaccinesWork #stewardmeme pic.twitter.com/fpGN6n5d4l
— Adi (@IDdocAdi) December 3, 2020