Right before we dive into our gems of the day, let us not forget, that Monday is not our friend. It is sinister, evil and comes straight from the depths of hell. Good news is, it’s almost over for now. Too bad it returns every week, like some sort of check engine light in your car, that you are trying to ignore. Unfortunately there is not enough duck tape to cover Monday itself. So sit back, relax and enjoy our top picks for today!
yesterday i talked to a guy for twenty minutes and then i asked him what he does for a living and he went “…Anthony, it’s me, [drag queen i hang out with all the time]” and that’s how I know superhero identities 100% would work
— Anthony Oliveira (@meakoopa) February 16, 2020
Finally a purpose for the internet pic.twitter.com/53YkVITqaA
— Josh McConnell (@joshmcconnell) February 12, 2020
I love the reaction of cat lovers upon seeing a cat. Every single time the level of excitement is like they've read about cats for decades but never actually seen one in real life and they're SO EXCITED. Every. Single Time. Even if it's the hundredth cat they've seen that day.
— Molly Hodgdon (@Manglewood) February 16, 2020
*puts a tiny cowboy hat on a bee* beehaw
— Paul Blart: Time Cop (@tolntran) February 14, 2020
This might be the most talented man in the world that shit blew my mind pic.twitter.com/r4s10FKkuR
— Nacho 🇯🇲 (@Jalalapeno) February 14, 2020
Ah, lobsters. The bananas of the sea.
— The Notorious B.E.V. 🌈 (@blade_funner) February 16, 2020
escape room employee: would you like a hint?
me: hmm this door says PUSH which likely stands for Pull Until Secrets Happen
— soul nate (@MNateShyamalan) February 15, 2020
Absolutely disgusting service at Schiphol airport. 55 minutes we have been stood in the immigration queue. This isn’t the Brexit I voted for. pic.twitter.com/QcSne9d4qW
— Colin Browning (@ColinBrowning14) February 13, 2020
Guy who invented the pencil: now I can write down my brilliant ideas
Woman who invented the eraser: here you’ll need this
— *sigh*clops (@aotakeo) February 11, 2020
I just ate an entire cauliflower pizza which I highly recommend if you’re looking to make healthier choices, but still want to feel disappointed in yourself when you’re done.
— Panneda Express 🥡 (@justokpanda) February 15, 2020