Today, dear friends, you might observe a strange phenomenon in your neighborhood. Just look out of the window and watch all those little meerkats putting their tiny heads out of their burrows, sniffing and checking the street. Yes, we too are surprised that an entire week has passed without any dramatic event. No attempted coup, no attack on big business, no claims of election fraud! And yet you can’t get rid of this nervous feeling that something is lurking out there in the dark, the next hair-raising happening. What will it be? When will it happen? Just in case you feel the same, we suggest you go out, fill up your supplies of whatever meerkats use to get drunk and go back hiding in your cave again. Ah, and if you fear of missing out something, don’t worry, we got you covered. Here are the best tweets from today.
every day I wake up and begin the 16 hour process of getting ready for bed
— ye 🌍 (@yedoye_) February 2, 2021
me at 3am trying to plug my charger without getting out of the bed pic.twitter.com/sno8dDIAr6
— it’s my birthday 💗🥳🎉 (@kissfeels) February 4, 2021
my daughter said “it’s cold, but it’s a beautiful day.” ppl w no bills are so positive.
— B. (@DontWorryBoutB) February 4, 2021
chem test went so badly people are saying “i love you” in the class group chat
— jo! (@cowboypraxis) February 3, 2021
If a monkey hoarded more bananas than it could eat, while most of the other monkeys starved, scientists would study that monkey to figure out what the heck was wrong with it. When humans do it, we put them on the cover of Forbes.
— Nathalie Robin Justice (@welcomewords) February 2, 2021
I worked for 10 months in psychiatry. I’m now a GP. I see many people in moments of crisis, at their lowest moment.
We don’t need more “awareness” or “mental health ambassadors”. We need funding, more psychologists, more psychiatrists, more support, waiting times under a year.
— Mark (@Hiphopocrates) February 3, 2021
“the design is so lazy” to YOU but my 19yr old disabled sister who can’t put shoes on w/o assistance would LOVE these bad boys https://t.co/2e46rPrOE6
— gay little monkey in a gamestop (@deathofshe) February 1, 2021
is it so funny to me that acting awards are separated by gender. yeah nice oscar…. for a GIRL
— anna (@anna__online) February 2, 2021
My husband thinks I’m bad at multitasking but here’s a conversation we just had:
Me: Can I ask you something?
Him: Wait let me finish eating this cracker
— Sarah Cooper (@sarahcpr) February 4, 2021
so my cats an idiot pic.twitter.com/GiBx4ua67j
— sarah 🌙 (@lunarcrossing_) February 2, 2021