With Donald Trump attacking Iran and killing their top General, tensions are high and people want answers. We don’t have answers, but we do have your top ten Tweets of the day!
#1:
1st base: sex
2nd base: not wearing makeup
3rd base: calling each other
home run: discussing your mental health issues and past traumas
— Laurazepam (@andlikelaura) January 2, 2020
#2:
If World War 3 happens, the Wizarding World is staying out of it. Deal with it yourselves, Muggles. #WWIII
— Professor Snape (@_Snape_) January 3, 2020
#3:
boarding my plane and saw the flight attendant smashing a bag of ice and when i told them they were really going to town on it they replied “this is what i would do to the iceberg that sunk the titanic”
— Kristen Arnett (@Kristen_Arnett) January 2, 2020
#4:
lawyer: if you can stay a night in this house, it is yours. but beware there’s a terrible cu-
millennial: holy shit home ownership? im in
ghost: *appearing* prepare to die
millennial: omg even better
— soul nate (@MNateShyamalan) January 2, 2020
#5:
the US: we are considering adding women to the draft
me: call me old fashioned but yes, i was raised to serve my husband. cook for him. do the laundry. wake up at the crack of dawn to make him breakfast, prepare his clothes and clean the house.
— queen quen (@quenblackwell) January 3, 2020
#6:
It’s been one day since Melania told the press her New Years resolution was “peace on the world.”
— Bess Kalb (@bessbell) January 3, 2020
#7:
the United States is about to enter world war 3 and Justin beiber releases a song called “yummy” bro could you seriously not have waited for a better time
— Beans After Dark (@goodbeanalt) January 3, 2020
#8:
ron weasley: i have to use old books
harry potter: wow
ron: and torn up shitty clothes
harry: yuck lol
ron: would be crazy if my best friend had a vault full of gold and could maybe help me out a little
harry: ya lmao that would be crazy
— randy (@leakypod) January 3, 2020
#9:
if you voted for trump, gone head suit up and getcho ass in the field since you wanna make america great again 😂
— ray 💛 (@rayvenj__) January 3, 2020
#10:
to everyone on twitter asking if there’s a plan for what comes next: the President of the United States has a 3-minute attention span, zero ability to regulate emotions, can’t find Iran on a map, and is currently tweeting low-res American flag graphics. of course there’s no plan
— Leah Frances Greenberg (@Leahgreenb) January 3, 2020
