Twitter is always good for new food for thought. Even today, as a Twitter user shows us. Because how quickly would the world recover from COVID-19 if we had a global competition with prices like pizza parties about who has the lowest infection rates? Otherwise, we’re always so competitive. So…c’mon!
#1:
The best way to solve Covid is to turn it into some sort of game where the state with the lowest cases each week gets a pizza party or some shit. This unfortunately would work really well.
— Sam Taggart (@samttaggart) June 29, 2020
#2:
one night in 5th grade when my dad came home at the usual time of like 11pm I overheard him say to my mom “I am going to be working until the fucking day I die” so I tried to give my classmate’s dolls makeovers for 25¢ because I didn’t want my parents to worry about money anymore https://t.co/zGknPaEt7K
— sloane (sipihkopiyesis) (@cottoncandaddy) June 30, 2020
#3:
my ex-roommate, very rich, used to throw out her bath towels after one use. i brought it up to her, and she asked if it was weird. i said that it “seems symptomatic of exorbitant wealth.” she goes “well, april, it’s not very woke [sic] to pretend to be poor if you’re rich” lmfao
— april (@assignedcowgal) June 29, 2020
#4:
Steal his look pic.twitter.com/naGVSjHokW
— grim104 (@grim104) June 29, 2020
#5:
My wife is furious that I phoned the police about some kids selling homemade lemonade in the street. Specifically "they're not hurting anyone", "it's not illegal" and "they're our kids"
— Pessimus Prime Minister (@BigJDubz) June 30, 2020
#6:
17-year-old Me: Hey I wanna buy this beer
Clerk: No way, this is a fake ID. I’m calling the cops
Me: Oh good idea they’re probably 21
— the drake gatsby (@DrakeGatsby) June 30, 2020
#7:
People say white people have no culture but we actually have a long history of taking other people’s culture and making it worse.
— MehGyver (@TheAndrewNadeau) June 30, 2020
#8:
1979 horoscope i am fucking begging you to read this pic.twitter.com/ta2k3FbQvu
— wendy (@friends3000) June 30, 2020
#9:
u become king of england if u pull a sword from a stone. that should be how power transfers elsewhere. pull a baguette from an oven to become king of france. pull a bottle of vodka from a frozen river to become king of russia. pull a gun from a mayo jar to become king of the u.s.
— the hype (@TheHyyyype) June 29, 2020
#10:
Meet North’s Freesian horse. We have 14 gorgeous Freesians on the ranch. pic.twitter.com/E7N49kTCHG
— n (@auntanxiety) June 30, 2020