Recently at the Best of Twitter kiosk:
The truth about chemistry books: This is under the surface!
Marketing without limits: This is the new level of personalized
We’re revealing who Ivanka Trump really is. The person behind
the First Lady!
You ever get post meal clarity? You just be sitting there like “damn I probably could’ve ordered a medium”
— KAKUZU (@Yamscasino) July 14, 2020
I always wish someone had a crush on me, and then when someone does, I have a panic attack because fuck, that’s just way too much pressure
— Mara “Get Rid of the Nazis” Wilson (@MaraWilson) July 14, 2020
A chemistry text book is atoms explaining atoms to a bunch of atoms.
— Shower Thoughts (@TheWeirdWorld) July 15, 2020
i’ve heard of direct marketing but this is insane pic.twitter.com/o43U7I5lPV
— rudy betrayed (@rudy_betrayed) July 14, 2020
Trump soiled the WH Rose Garden with that performance. Presidents do not use the Rose Garden in that kind of naked political fashion. That was not a press conference, as the WH described it. It was a campaign rally disguised as a press conference. It was a bait and switch.
— Jim Acosta (@Acosta) July 14, 2020
I don’t want much, really, I don’t. I just want my president to be smarter than me and not a racist.
Go ahead and call me crazy, but I really don’t think I’m asking too much.
— Valerie Bertinelli (@Wolfiesmom) July 15, 2020
Ivanka Trump is the Gwyneth Paltrow of Marie Antoinettes of Eva Brauns.
— Liddle’ Savage (@littledeekay) July 14, 2020
dudes dress up nicer for golf than they do for dates
— James (@CaucasianJames) July 14, 2020
my girlfriend and i are on a little road trip and she’s driving, which means it’s my job to look out the window and periodically say “horsies” or “cows”
— Jill Gutowitz (@jillboard) July 14, 2020
don’t forget to wear your mask pic.twitter.com/LXjDTlfRIl
— ً (@weebflix) July 14, 2020