There is a parallel universe in which weekends start on Monday. People are happy and living in peace, cheering and dancing every night and day. There is no Trump, no Covid-19 and no need to go to work. Cats and dogs live together in awkward harmony. Unfortunately we’re all trapped in this abomination of reality. [*sad music plays*] And all you can do is to let this shitty day happen und read our tweet selection in the end. Enjoy!
#1:
I spent too much time trying to please and befriend people when really I need to be focusing on what’s more important, pleasing and befriending crows
— Mara “Get Rid of the Nazis” Wilson (@MaraWilson) July 19, 2020
#2:
Unreal pic.twitter.com/nmh1CBbSC6
— Carey O'Donnell (@ecareyo) July 19, 2020
#3:
Me realizing I’ve lived through 9/11, a recession, an endless war in the Middle East, the Trump presidency and now a global pandemic…. pic.twitter.com/GfvaTrDGnd
— Mateo (@selfmadematt) July 18, 2020
#4:
Omg in the 1900s tampons were soaked on opium to relieve pain and relax the vagina 😳 BRING THAT FUCKING BACK
— FREE OROMIA YOU BASTARDS (@amoure_af) July 17, 2020
#5:
having a 3 day argument about who Squidward would vote for that ends with me and another user driving to each other’s houses with guns at exactly the same time and passing each other on the interstate unknowingly
— condom taste tester (@ByYourLogic) July 19, 2020
#6:
— pax the dog: moon disrespector (@paxthedog) July 19, 2020
#7:
Chris Wallace to Trump on Trump's cognitive test: "Well, it's not the hardest test. It shows a picture and it says, 'what's that'. And it's an elephant." pic.twitter.com/7hnZphc1Rp
— Kyle Griffin (@kylegriffin1) July 19, 2020
#8:
I eat most of my meals out of the same bowl like a child, or a cowboy
— Tessa Strain (@tessastrain) July 15, 2020
#9:
*goes outside*
*nods*
*goes back inside* pic.twitter.com/YReskG7ndV— Uncle Duke (@UncleDuke1969) July 18, 2020
#10:
Thinking about starting a hair salon in the middle of the pandemic and calling it Apocaclips
— Pru (@prufrockluvsong) July 18, 2020