In case you were just about to google the early symptoms of a heart attack after you’ve noticed that slight tremor in your fingers, you can stop now. It is neither a heart attack (at least unlikely) nor withdrawal symptoms (well …) but the hormone cocktail that can only mean one thing: the weekend is here. Yes, party people, time to get ex-ci-ted! Finally you can do all the great things you don’t have time for during the week. Like … cleaning the toilet or taking out the trash while the rest of the family, the dog, the roommate or whoever … well, have you ever heard of Sisyphus? Anyway, don’t despair, as usual we offer you a little bit of distraction, today with Schrödinger’s coffee, wisdom from Rome, and dogs who are up to no good. Happy weekend with the best Tweets of the day!
#1:
Alabama doctor says this about her Covid patients, some of whom are dying: “One of the last things they do before they’re intubated is beg me for the vaccine. I hold their hand and tell them that I’m sorry, but it’s too late.” https://t.co/WEgAhHW2hf
— Joyce Alene (@JoyceWhiteVance) July 21, 2021
#2:
when i say “i should be there in 5!” i’m almost always using the moral sense of the word ‘should’, not the like probability sense. like yeah being there in 5 minutes would be the right thing, even though it’s not going to happen
— charlie (@chunkbardey) July 21, 2021
#3:
life is just alternating between telling people “sorry im being weird i had too much coffee” and “sorry im being weird i haven’t had enough coffee” forever until you die
— Dana Donnelly (@danadonly) July 22, 2021
#4:
My dad’s two dogs expelled from dog daycare due to forming a “dog gang”
— Sophie Haigney (@SophieHaigney) July 22, 2021
#5:
Cleaning your house before going on vacation and coming home to a tidy home is top tier
— muva goat 🐐 (@TheNotoriousKIA) July 21, 2021
#6:
you have to respect one of my clients, based in Italy, who upon receiving an email from me yesterday responded with «Katy, today in Rome it’s a day for living on the beach» and ignored all of my questions x
— katy 🌙 (@KatyGilroyBlog) July 21, 2021
#7:
My husband has just had a pay rise, which is lovely, but I can’t help notice that in the last 10 years, his salary has increased 87%, while mine has increased by 18%
I’ve spent most of that time working on curing cancer. He’s been calculating your car insurance.
— Dr Angharad Watson (@AngharadWatson) July 21, 2021
#8:
Told my landlord we had ants and he said “We cannot kill them. We can not outsmart them. They have been here longer than us. They will find a way.”
— Grace Freud (@GraceGFreud) July 22, 2021
#9:
You know you’ve mastered marriage when you ask your spouse to hand you “that thingy” over there and they know exactly what that means.
— Jawbreaker (@sixfootcandy) July 22, 2021
#10:
This dog 🥺 pic.twitter.com/RnLxwIrZTj
— Marvin Gay (@Queen_Finxa) July 21, 2021
