Hello on this wonderful Sunday evening! The children are happy, the beer is cold, and the ocean is on fire – business as usual, right? But not with us, cause here you will learn how to use frogs as weapons, at which point «Fast & Furious» turns illogical and why men are like omelettes. Have fun with the best Tweets of the day!
#1:
My son has been away all week on a school trip. I asked my daughter: ‘do you miss your brother?’
She looked at me puzzled and said ‘isn’t he in his room?’ALL week.
— Shaparak Khorsandi (@ShappiKhorsandi) July 2, 2021
#2:
Italy has issued a a new €2 coin to say “Grazie” to its doctors and nurses. pic.twitter.com/kLBtBb0koX
— Xavi Ruiz (@xruiztru) July 2, 2021
#3:
I actually don’t think we’re angry enough about rich people going to space while the world burns
— Read Parable of the Sower by Octavia Butler (@JoshuaPotash) July 3, 2021
#4:
I didn’t realise how tiny my wife is until I took her favourite sweater out of the dryer
— Sammich (@SamNonTheWiser) January 19, 2021
#5:
There are 4 guys in the world pic.twitter.com/EWSk0bm828
— HardDick Savage! (@madumagica) July 2, 2021
#6:
What I say: I am tired
What my kids hear: I am weak. I am no longer fit to lead. Now is your chance.
— Arianna Bradford (@thearibradford) June 30, 2021
#7:
it’s weird that Vin Diesel’s name is Vin Diesel in real life and in the Fast and Furious movies he’s like «me? yeah I drive cars. My name’s… Dominic»
— JAKE FLORES (@feraljokes) July 3, 2021
#8:
dog: *in tears* i was barking but-
judge: take ur time
dog: he still went to work
jury: *audible gasp*
— witt (@50FirstTates) July 1, 2021
#9:
Look, either get vaccinated before more strains appear or we all have to learn the Greek alphabet. Those are the options.
— Daniel Silvermint (@DSilvermint) July 3, 2021
#10:
she’s using the frog as a WEAPONpic.twitter.com/ykaWK1LIty
— Living Morganism 🌱 (@ok_girlfriend) July 3, 2021