Welcome back everyone. Summer is finally here and it is getting hot – or is that just us? No, sorry, please don’t leave! Basically we don’t even care as the only light our skin ever touches is the pale glare of our monitors. In our fern-like existence sunlight might be rare, but instead we do have regrowing headphones, floating corgi butts and a swarm of bees. Please enjoy the best Tweets from today.
#1:
you ever jus say fuck it and go to bed at a decent time
— Corn 𖤐 (@snuurid) June 14, 2021
#2:
That’s the last time I buy AirPods from the farmers market 😒 pic.twitter.com/ryTj8G6EL0
— Matt👽 (@Chxmbs) June 10, 2021
#3:
Little girl just jumped into my arms and rested her head on my shoulder in the ED. Her dad said “she’s never seen a black doctor before and I think she thinks you’re Doc McStuffins”🥺
— Rachel Buckle-Rashid, MD (@RABuckle) June 13, 2021
#4:
Just found out that an Axolotl is not in fact a Pokémon
— BadBoyHalo (@BadBoyHalo) June 15, 2021
#5:
When you see that friend posting about how glad they are to be outside again when you know they never stayed inside to begin with pic.twitter.com/CmC0UQjQYz
— Olivia A. Cole (@RantingOwl) June 13, 2021
#6:
A guy on Lexington Ave asked me for 10 dollars so he can get dinner, I told him all I had was a 5 and gave it to him. He said “thank you but why are you so poor”.
New York is back baby
— raf (@rafaelshimunov) June 14, 2021
#7:
must be nice being able to watch a movie without the overwhelming urge to google every single cast members acting repertoire and marital status
— Miriam✨🦋 (@miriamdalll) June 13, 2021
#8:
I was talking with my kid (who is non-binary) about a friend whose child just also started using they/them pronouns. The parents were struggling to get the switch right, so my kiddo said, «tell them to imagine that, instead of a person, their kid is a swarm of bees.»
— Tom Rademacher (@MrTomRad) June 14, 2021
#9:
Today I learned that corgi butts can float. Not sure what to do with this info, other than share it with you. 14/10 what a good buoy pic.twitter.com/An7OC6nXJs
— WeRateDogs® (@dog_rates) June 13, 2021
#10:
One time I almost got fired because a district manager asked me how long it would take to fix someone’s inventory fuck up on the computer and i said «an hour and a half» and they went «how long would it take with my help?» And I said «3 hours»
— Beardo ‹Witcher-Pilled› Weirdo (@ItsBeardoWeirdo) June 12, 2021