Since we can all agree that we don’t miss Trump per se, but do feel like there’s a lack of an easy target for inappropriate jokes, the «penis tanker» in the Suez Canal came (no pun intended) right on time. We would gladly see the guy responsible trying to parallel park a van at some point in the future. What else is new on this Saturday? We have racoons for you, a seductive dog right out of the psych ward, and of course the all time classic: gun control in the United States. So if you’re at home and not stuck behind 1499 other boats somewhere in the Middle East, please enjoy our gems of the day!
rip pavlov you would have loved notifications
— zach silberberg (@zachsilberberg) March 26, 2021
Hey, sorry I forgot to text you back, I was outside looking for raccoons, lost track of time, did not want to text you back & wondered if the raccoons liked lasagna.
— Roxi Horror 💀🌸 (@roxiqt) March 27, 2021
me trying to seductively lick a crumb off my lip pic.twitter.com/cDPnSqBaLz
— Lil Bit 🌈 (@LizerReal) March 26, 2021
Every morning I wake up and check in with the news to find out which rights are being taken away. And it's never "gun."
— Ashley Nicole Black (@ashleyn1cole) March 26, 2021
sorry i’m late there was this fucking cargo ship
— Rachel (@femaleredhead) March 26, 2021
You are NOT too much. You are ENTITLED to take up space. If the Suez Canal doesn't have room for you that is the Suez Canal's problem.
— Lindsay King-Miller (@AskAQueerChick) March 26, 2021
People who say “this website is free!” have obviously never considered the cost of our mental health
— jon drake (@DrakeGatsby) March 26, 2021
trying to teach my sons about rejecting toxic masculinity and then some other dad insults my lawn and I fucken lose it
— Village Person (@SvnSxty) March 26, 2021
Found my soulmate on Etsy pic.twitter.com/olr0VGCDQb
— Julicorn 🦄 (@ChicksRule) March 26, 2021
Imagine being the captain of the first ship to pass through the Suez after it gets unblocked and knowing that you have the potential to do the funniest thing that anyone has ever done ever.
— Ben Jenkins (@bencjenkins) March 26, 2021