You guys remember when we were all outraged by the 750 dollars Trump payed in taxes for 2019? Feels like months, but that was not even two weeks ago. The longer this hellhole of a year lasts, the more convinced I am that someone is messing with the space-time continuum. And not in the cute «we can materialize ice cream on the spot whenever we want» Star Trek way. Or perhaps we are all part of a story someone writes and the author suddenly decided crack is the creative creators drug to be. But since we can’t change anything, let’s enjoy the ride until the celebration of Christmas 2021 probably starts with «Let the Hunger Games begin!».
Oh, and enjoy our daily.
#1:
when ppl ask to come inside my apartment I always say no bc that’s what a vampire would ask.
— .:RiotGrl:. (@RiotGrlErin) October 13, 2020
#2:
After two minutes of waiting for a relaxation app to download, I threw my phone out the window and smoked a cigarette instead
— Eternal Samnation (@portmanteauface) October 12, 2020
#3:
2020 is a rest stop that time travelers zoom right past even if they REALLY have to pee.
— The UnDead Mr. Fitz (@UnFitz) September 5, 2020
#4:
[day 5]
columbus: india!
sailor: that…that’s driftwood[day 12]
columbus: india!
sailor: that’s clearly a dolphin[day 27]
columbus: india!
sailor: you’re pointing at carl[at america]
columbus: india!
sailor: that—you know what? sure. you did it, chris. that’s india— MehGyver (@TheAndrewNadeau) October 12, 2020
#5:
detective: he’s been poisoned. the proof is in the pudding
me: *face absolutely covered in chocolate* wait it’s where
— tatum (@50FirstTates) October 12, 2020
#6:
Don’t trust a gay man who asks, “can you just take a pic of me real quick?”
That bitch will make you work harder than a freelance photographer for Vogue.
— SluttyNurseBrianCostume (@rn_murse) October 12, 2020
#7:
me, turning into a werewolf: get out of here. it's not safe
girl: [holding a tennis ball behind back] i think i'll b fine lmao
— tatum (@50FirstTates) October 12, 2020
#8:
Hypnotist: [crying in a corner] why aren’t you getting sleepy!?
3 year old: I’m thirsty
— Crockett🍀 (@CrockettForReal) October 12, 2020
#9:
I'm very polite. I always say "no, thank you" when I hit decline on your call.
— That Pesky Prostitüt™ (@LittleMissAngr1) October 12, 2020
#10:
I’m celebrating Columbus Day by taking over my husband’s closet and then, when he gets justifiably upset, trying to convince him that it’s for his benefit.
— Snarky Mommy (@SnarkyMommy78) October 12, 2020
