YES, it’s Friday again and the weekend is almost there. In case you plan to spend the next days standing in an endless line, we would like to give you a survival package (spoiler: it will also work if you’re lying on your couch). It entails: Batman’s bat(h)robe, an unexpected substitute for a stimulus check, fruits that might give you true passion, the world’s best brother, and six other gems. Please enjoy!
#1:
Weird substitute for a stimulus check but I’ll take it https://t.co/SuZGbvjxc7
— not jt (@JayTeeTodd) October 15, 2020
#2:
My 3yo said “hi old lady” to our 50 year old neighbour so at least I don’t have to worry about her stopping to talk to me anymore
— MumInBits (@MumInBits) October 15, 2020
#3:
When your costume is on point but your mom makes you wear a jacket pic.twitter.com/zxXDVWcnDT
— Adam (@adamgreattweet) October 15, 2020
#4:
My favorite genre of movie is “This MAN 😂😂 is taking care of CHILDREN 🤣🤣”
— jon drake (@DrakeGatsby) October 15, 2020
#5:
A parody of Taken about a black woman who follows Trump around nodding at everything he says. It’s called… Token
— Sarah Cooper (@sarahcpr) October 16, 2020
#6:
hamlet: to be, or not to be!
schrödinger: this dude fuckin gets it
— abs 🙂 (@tropicanapussy) October 15, 2020
#7:
guns n’ roses only criteria for calling a place “paradise:”
1) women are attractive
2) grass normal color— nate of the living dead (@MNateShyamalan) October 15, 2020
#8:
Going to Europe so I can lie about my height, like «I’m over six feet tall» and they’ll be like «idk what that is so I have no choice but to believe you»
— Ron Iver (@ronnui_) October 15, 2020
#9:
fruits that do not live up to their names:
passionfruit
grapefruit
honeydew
dragonfruitfruits that do live up to their names:
orange
— eli the pumpkin pie (@jazz_inmypants) October 15, 2020
#10:
weird looking brother https://t.co/W1Nw7XwmGJ
— ً (@3dnzo) October 15, 2020
