As the weekend approaches, so does the stories. You know what we are talking about. It’s the calling an Uber and ending up at your ex house. Maybe it’s waking up Saturday night in the middle of the street. Last but not least, it could be playing a little prank on yourself. If you haven’t guessed it already, we are talking about your drunk stories. On that note, have a good weekend and make some safe drunk stories.
#1:
Interviewer: says here you’re a reverse psychologist
Me: no it doesn’t
— Dropped Mike (@rebrafsim) September 11, 2020
#2:
Being in bed, night: This is where all My Thoughts are, I am laying in mind jail
Being in bed, morning: Hell yeah baby this is my forever place
— Ron Iver (@ronnui_) September 11, 2020
#3:
[first day as librarian]
guy: i’m looking for a book—
me: —YOU SIR ARE IN LUCK
— slate (@PleaseBeGneiss) September 10, 2020
#4:
imagine ur card declines while bungee jumping and they cut the rope
— cam (@climaxximus) September 10, 2020
#5:
Clifford where are we getting property with $1200???? Answer quickly https://t.co/qTGq4KyBaf
— baking nail tech (@foreverimbetter) September 10, 2020
#6:
I drank last night and that little prankster (me, but intoxicated) hid my wallet as a funny prank
— Alpha (@Alpharad) September 10, 2020
#7:
TikTok and that cups song from Pitch Perfect narrowly avoiding each other like asteroids
— Marc (@MarcSnetiker) September 10, 2020
#8:
what do ALL of my tattoos mean??, well i am glad u asked. This one means i have $80. this one means I had $150. this one means I had like $350 just kicking around. This one means—
— brods (@fuckbrods) September 9, 2020
#9:
wife: our son came home with a backpack half full of drugs
me: i'll handle it
[later]
son: i'm grounded?!?
me: look son [refilling backpack] you're not moving enough of our product
— Terry F (@daemonic3) September 10, 2020
#10:
the perfect tattoo DOES exist pic.twitter.com/jebcCdSL4j
— Rob N Roll (@thegallowboob) September 10, 2020
