It is officially the beginning of autumn, the trees become more colorful, the temperatures are getting colder and the days shorter. But that doesn’t have to mean anything bad! Because this is the season of long walks, cuddly evenings in front of the fireplace, and lots of tea. And Halloween of course! 😉 We’re also starting the fall at Best of twitter and invite you to join us tonight with our Daily!
HAPPY FIRST DAY OF FALL!
*throws razor out of the window*
— Jawbreaker (@sixfootcandy) September 22, 2020
white people love serial killer documentaries but cry when the barista fucks up their latte
— linc (@lincnotfound) September 22, 2020
Not even Einstein would have thought of something like this. pic.twitter.com/vxlWu9Wong
— You Had One Job! (@_youhadonejob1) September 23, 2020
dating a girl with twitter, is getting in one argument and now watching her retweet 25 “I hate men” tweets
— bobby wasabi (@bIondiewasabi) September 23, 2020
Amazon Prime is the worst.
"Oh I fancy this film"
Prime: You have to pay for that one, mate
"How bout this one?"
Prime: Nah, you gotta subscribe to Starzplay, whatever the fuck that is!
"This one then?"
Prime: You have to throw a clog into the sea if you want to watch it
— joe heenan (@joeheenan) September 20, 2020
Last night, someone left a comment on my Instagram advising me that they wanted me out of “their” country, along with “the people who brought [me] here.”
Mom and Dad are gonna be so pissed when they hear that we have to go back where we came from. They hate New Jersey.
— Arianna Bradford (@TheNYAMProject) September 22, 2020
girls spend 3 hours organizing their iphone home screen while their rooms look like this pic.twitter.com/hw4KO8VJxq
— ˗ˏˋ ryn ˎˊ˗ (@onlineryn) September 22, 2020
My ex boyfriend once complimented my boobs mid-sex, and I replied "thanks, I grew them myself" in case anyone had any doubts about how fun I am in the bedroom
— Girl on the Hill (@Mom_Overboard) September 22, 2020
halloween people posting “it’s spooooooky time!” like yeah we’re about to lose roe v wade
— 𝗰𝗮𝗹𝗲𝗯 𝗵𝗲𝗮𝗿𝗼𝗻 (@calebsaysthings) September 22, 2020
mfs be like “how’d you know i’m catholic?” and their name is “john-paul michael james”
— Lumberzack (@ItsLumberzack) September 22, 2020