A wise man once said «a true friend is someone you can call at 2am and he’ll show up with a shovel and a large bag, no questions asked.» While i personally agree, there may be other definitions. Here are a few we thought you might enjoy. (But always have a friend with a shovel. Seriously)
Liking the same stuff is one thing. But hating the same things? True friendship.
— Jen Doll (@thisisjendoll) January 14, 2016
Facetiming your best friend like pic.twitter.com/Up9OwM9Wax
— Gianluca Il Volo (@GianGinoble) February 2, 2017
Adult friendship is saying “let me call you back” hanging up and calling back 3-4 days later and no one takes it personal.
— BROOKLYN.J 🌻 (@SmileBKLYN) January 10, 2018
[me telling my story how I survived a plane crash and lived on a deserted island for a year] it was crazy
[friend who once got a text from me where I accidentally called the grinch the grink] was the grink there?
— brent (@murrman5) October 1, 2019
friends: you must have been pretty drunk at bar trivia last night when you wrote Marie Biologist as an answer
me who drank pepsi all night: haha I was a mess
— brent (@murrman5) January 20, 2020
Every beer is a 'craft beer' if you're making friendship bracelets, drunk.
— Uncle Duke (@UncleDuke1969) April 24, 2015
I love those random friendships with people in your classes where they know every detail of your life but you don’t like, know their last name
— ellie schnitt (@holy_schnitt) April 19, 2018
"dOnT tExT DuRinG a DaTe iTs RuDe"
if my friends DONT text me back while they're on a date i will call the fucking fbi and have a SWAT team rain fire down on that restaurant i swear to GOD
— Matt. (@MattTheBrand) November 26, 2019
THERAPIST: You need more friends
ME: I put bird seed that attracts raccoons in the backyard, last week
THERAPIST: … So all of these-
ME: [surrounded by raccoons] Whatever you have to say to me, you can say in front of the garbage boys
— Roxi Horror 💀🌸 (@roxiqt) November 2, 2019
Me: I'd invite you in but my place is a mess
Friend: That's OK. I don't mind
M: The mess tho
F: Don't be silly
M: I don't want u in my house
— mo (@chuuew) November 7, 2015
Do I have “friends”? What am I, 5
— Bea_ker (@bea_ker) November 19, 2019