Interpersonal relationships, also known as marriage – a constant hotspot for jokes and funny sayings, but there is plenty of reasons for this. After all, you live with a person 24/7. During this time, material for good tweets is inevitably created. How fortunate, because that’s why we can once again offer you the best of the funniest tweets about marriage and relationships! Have fun!
Just found out my wife’s been mad at me for three days and I hadn’t noticed. She forgave me and I had to act like I was grateful and not bewildered
— 🇬🇧 Dr. Nerd 🇨🇦 (@hermanntrude) May 12, 2020
trying to make my bf propose to me after 4 months pic.twitter.com/sipqnjX6ma
— grace 💫 (@thebiggestyee) May 10, 2020
My girlfriend’s favorite activity is talking to me from other rooms in the house at a volume too low for me to hear what she’s saying
— Matt Ingebretson (@mattingebretson) April 30, 2020
A bachelor party makes more sense after a divorce instead of before a wedding.
— Shower Thoughts (@TheWeirdWorld) April 29, 2020
Me: you’re mad at me?
Wife: no, not even sure why you would say that.
Me: I can tell by the sound of you putting the plates away.
Wife: fuck you and fuck those plates.
Me: there it is.
— WTFDAD (@daddydoubts) February 26, 2020
Marriage is all about choices. My husband chose napping over loading the dishwasher. I loaded the dishwasher and chose to fill it with dish soap before leaving for work.
— Maryfairyboberry (@MaryJustice86) January 8, 2020
My husband hid from me tonight so he wouldn't have to help me clean. Don't worry. I found him.
But the police won't.
— Laura Marie (@lmegordon) April 18, 2020
Why can’t marriage licenses expire like driver licenses?
— Tony P. (@Tbone7219) December 15, 2019
I guess one silver lining of this quarantine is that my wife and I are communicating better than ever. For instance, today, I asked her if she would like me to do the laundry, and she told me to go fuck myself.
— bob saget (@bobsaget) April 22, 2020
I put some perfume on yesterday just ‘cause. My husband said something smelled good, asked if I was burning a candle, or sprayed air freshener. Tell me why I’ve worn this scent (Amazing Grace by Philosophy) for fifteen years, y’all, and he’s never said one word about it.
— Darlin’ Darla (@Darlainky) May 12, 2020
wife: did you get milk?
me: I forgot
me: I forgot that too
her: did you forget to go to the supermarket?
me: *long pause* yes
— john (@mrjohndarby) November 15, 2019