Like the great philosopher Homer (S.) already said: Alcohol, the cause of, and solution to, all of life’s problems. Time to dedicate a whole segment to the one thing that almost every culture has in common and sometimes even solved ancient wars. And probably triggered the start of some. Anyway, here’s to alcohol. Cheers.
#1:
"Wine" is French for "fancy sleepy headache juice."
— Trevor S (@trevso_electric) February 23, 2014
#2:
Guests: I brought you some non-alcoholic wine
Me: oh excellent *pours it down the sink without breaking eye contact*
— DaddyJew (@DaddyJew) November 27, 2014
#3:
when u get too drunk at the club and everyone is like ummm lets get u home pic.twitter.com/bQLMVMLqTv
— lauren ashley bishop (@sbellelauren) June 14, 2015
#4:
Who called them drunken texts and not remorse code
— Fred Delicious (@Fred_Delicious) March 6, 2015
#5:
Ahhh yes of course, I adore wine. I especially love [looks down at bottle of Pinot Grigio] peanut Gregorio
— Sage Boggs (@sageboggs) January 19, 2015
#6:
[visiting family]
1st beer: Civil conversation about work
5th: Heated talk on politics
12th: Shouting match about the best ninja turtle
— James Breakwell, Exploding Unicorn (@XplodingUnicorn) September 30, 2016
#7:
Today is the 2 year anniversary of me chipping my front tooth on a beer bottle to impress a guy who it turns out already had a girlfriend.
— Sophia Benoit (@1followernodad) June 9, 2017
#8:
FLIGHT ATTENDANT: Could you operate the emergency exit door if needed?
ME (once tried to unscrew a pry off beer cap for 20 min.): Sure.— Ray Classic (@SirEviscerate) December 12, 2016
#9:
"Wine" is French for "fancy sleepy headache juice."
— Trevor S (@trevso_electric) February 23, 2014
#10:
22 year old me after a night of drinking: "I hope I didn't do anything stupid."
29 year old me: "I hope I didn't agree to go on a hike."
— karms (@IanKarmel) April 26, 2014