They are our best friends, our fellow in misery and our partner in crime! But they especially always make us laugh!
DOG: I think that job interview went well!— Ray (@SirEviscerate) May 20, 2015
*looks in mirror and sees ear was inside-out the whole time* Son of a
gf: what u thinking about— Hey Buddy Comics (@HeyBuddyComics) November 11, 2019
me: [worrying that the dog is mad at me because i haven't bought him a ball in a while] other girls
No big deal; just a guy playing fetch with a beluga whale… ? pic.twitter.com/PdSNgVABIu— Steve Stewart-Williams (@SteveStuWill) November 7, 2019
God: hey can we talk?— Oops!…I Dad It Again (@NewDadNotes) November 10, 2019
Cat: what’s up?
God: I thought you loved the humans?
Cat: I love them so much!
God: but you ignore them like 90% of the time.
Cat: I’m playing hard to get.
Cat: don’t wanna seem too desperate.
Cat: omg did they say something about me?
“Mike, how many times do we have to go through this: we don’t need B roll footage of squirrels.” pic.twitter.com/5lySuyzDFw— The Personification of Nevil (@TheAlexNevil) August 1, 2019
I bet kangaroos get drunk and find some ridiculous shit in their pouches in the morning.— [crying in Thanksgiving] (@SortaBad) February 21, 2012
*shakes wife awake*— Cat Whom Eats Turkey (@Laser_Cat) August 20, 2014
Karen. Karen! Don't make any sudden moves…he's back again. pic.twitter.com/4Xb5jPfXPL
You can't leave the aquarium with a penguin.— ?ᑌᖇᔕᑌᒪᗩ? (@3sunzzz) August 14, 2016
It's a stuffed animal I got in the gift shop.
Ma'am, it's moving.
I GOT IT IN THE GIFT SHOP!
[restaurant]— clean slate (@PleaseBeGneiss) August 24, 2018
RACCOON (in trench coat): one egg
WAITER: one egg? *suspicious* you’re not from around here, are you?
RACCOON: t-two eggs?
WAITER: ah yes, that’s a normal quantity of eggs
RACCOON: *excitedly* five eggs!
WAITER: *eyes narrow*
i am in literal TEARS over how pure the energy in this video is pic.twitter.com/tbPGt3h6iQ— arisa (@mcrmikan) November 10, 2019