Renting is definitely one of the perks when you’re living in a bigger city. Investing half of your monthly income into what is basically a closet with locks, the exciting interactions with your neighbours when you tell the college girl next door that you DON’T have a corkscrew at 2am in the morning on a Tuesday, the joy you feel when you’re part of the journey called growing up aka screaming newborns at every hour of the weekend, what’s not to like? And don’t even get us started on hunting for a flat. The learning experience you are allowed to have when competing with people who’s job can be basically described as «rich son» and the choices you have between «gang infected wasteland but affordable» and «I have only one kidney left, but that would be enough for half of the deposit». The whole process is a gift that keeps on giving. And we found a whole bunch of people who are feeling exactly the same. Enjoy!
#1:
My entire personality is captured in the fact that I take five minutes to remove the “I’m sorry to bother you but” from the text to my landlord saying the washing machine is broken.
— Jeff Guhin (@jeffguhin) February 4, 2020
#2:
me: my hot water doesn’t work
landlord: not my domain
firelord: nor mine
me: what
waterlord: [rising out of the sink] WHO DARES DISRUPT THE MIGHTY WATERLORD, GOD OF THE 7 SEAS
me: i-i do. My hot water doesn’t work
waterlord: oh shit for real? i'll call the plumber
— Kellen (@captainkalvis) February 5, 2019
#3:
Rent is due in April, can you be a bit more specific? Work with me here guys. https://t.co/He32bRXRRZ
— Oluwaseun (@Gunter_fol) March 18, 2020
#4:
bushwick is like
person: *doesnt do the dishes*
their roommate: hey can someone do the dishes? we have bugs
person on IG story: hey I’m trying to move out of my TOXIC living situation, my abusive roommate is making unfair demands of me and withholdi
— ryan finn (@rianphin) September 12, 2019
#5:
Tenants: So I pay ££ and I get to live here?
Landlord: you can exist in the space. Do not interact with or interrupt the space. There must be no signs of ‘living’. The house is your god now and you must serve it. I am also your god now. Please, have some mould. I was never here.
— puddle of bludd (@_lauramipsum_) April 17, 2019
#6:
I'm beginning to think my landlord has a different relationship with the rent payment than I do pic.twitter.com/2g3Tx894Lg
— Matt Poldberg 🍍🍕 (@NotSpamIpromise) December 4, 2019
#7:
If you’re renting, and your landlord has a no pets policy, you can keep bats as long as you pretend to be mad about it.
— Queer Paranormal 🏳️🌈👻 (@ParanormalQueer) January 20, 2020
#8:
When a landlord tells you rent payments are their entire income, they're telling you that the only thing they do for a living is own your home.
— Faith (@RoseOfWindsong) March 21, 2020
#9:
My landlord is obsessed w rent that was due literally weeks ago ? Move on babe
— cancela lansbury (@gossipbabies) November 9, 2018
#10:
Apartment hunting in New York means saying things like "I'm fine with a little light criminal activity in exchange for a dishwasher."
— Mrs. Detective Pikajew, Esq. (@clapifyoulikeme) July 27, 2018